Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize