What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
