I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
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apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
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I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
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