My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
It's blow job season.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
