Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize