We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Randomize
