i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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