Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
31 Times Kim Kardashian Showed Her Love For Balmain
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
19 Tricks To Help You Join The Mile High Club
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.