Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Randomize
