it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Randomize
