that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Randomize
