lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober