her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I just forgot I was standing up.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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