I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
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