"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
