So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
