Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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