can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
