I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
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