If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize