is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
