he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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