its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Randomize
