At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize