Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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