I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
