sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize