wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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