Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
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