did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize