He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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