why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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