If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
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