it wasn't lemon gatorade
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
