You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
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