matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Randomize
