It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
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