I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
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