I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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