i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
