stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
