I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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