***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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