I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
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