The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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