The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
