I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
21 Times Karma Showed These People Not to Mess Around
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon