My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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