we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
