i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
id be glad to
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
