U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
